A Whole New Beginning.

I have been dreaming of my new beginning forever. It feels like it.
I have needed it to come. Need to get away from the people and the past that hauntet me.
And now it's here. Right here in front of me. And I'm not sure it is what I want.
I feel so free. I'm so glad to be rid of the idiots that surrounded me at my old school. I really truely are. Even though I miss the girls I used to hang with. They are missed.
I am all excited about my new apartment. It is thrilling to be one my own for the first time.
But I am lonely. Not in the "I'm-all-alone-in-the-world" kind of way, but more in the "I-have-no-social-life-in-my-near-surroundings" kind of way. And I know it turns when I begin at my new school, when I start to meet new people, when I befrined my new colleuges.
But about them, my new work-buddies .. Well, I was so fond of my old onces, that it is so much more than hard to have to adjust into a new group of people. I hate being an unfamiliar face at a work place - which in the basics it just the same as my prirror one, but not even comes close to have the same rutines, or even humor. I can't figure it out. I know it gets better and that it takes time to be a part of the group. But before that time comes, it just plain sucks. Especially when I think of my old job. Then it just straight out tortures me.

However, I really do look forward to starting at my new school. I'm going to be a nurse. Which I know is a step down from my surgon dream, but this is much more sutied for me. and when we hit steptember I plan on becomming a scout-leader again. And THAT i am looking so much forward to ! I really am.

But . As I sit here. In my new beginning, I wonder how it is going to work out. I know I have wanted this forever. But that just doesn't make it any esaier adjusting to all the new.